New Year's Resolutions & My Partner's Path to Citizenship

 

I have learned from my partner of over a decade that as an immigrant, he learned as a child to think about the big picture. He grew up in Egypt, and had a love for computers. As a child, he decided that he wanted to move to the United States and become a software engineer. His father's friend purchased him his first computer in the early nineties, and the desire to move toward his dreams grew. 

He studied English, focused on his education, and worked with his parents to find a path toward college in the US. He did not qualify for student loans as a foreign citizen, and attended a very small college in Alabama. This college was the most affordable path for him and while it is not widely recognized, this leap at the age of 18 set him toward this bucket list goal. He struggled to keep up due to the language barrier, but found a core group of friends among the other "foreign students." 

He worked to support himself by repairing computers at the homes of professors, using his skills to keep his basic needs met. After college he struggled to find work where he could be sponsored, but eventually landed a job. This struggle to find work after achieving such a big goal of coming to the United States hit his confidence and took an emotional toll. But, he continued to move forward with the support of his "American Family" of friends and colleagues.

Now, my partner has a very successful career at one of the largest Tech companies in the United States. He is incredibly humble and would never brag about his success. So, I will brag for him. You would never guess that a kid growing up in Egypt would land a dream job and create a life in California, but after 25 years in the United States he is a success story. 

So many therapists suggest that New Year's resolutions are a false or unrealistic time where people set unachievable goals.  Beginning today, we will redefine the New Year's Resolution into a frame of "hope for your future". Never let mental health rules about "SMART goals" stand in the way of day dreaming. You are capable of achieving anything you wish for your life. Whether it is finding a new career, a healthy relationship, creating a network of friends, or even moving across the globe, you can achieve your dreams.